How would you navigate an experience of being treated unfairly?
Recently I coached a woman who was going through this exact problem, and finding that standing up for herself about it didn’t lead to an immediate solution.
Naturally, this led to her feeling very strong emotions of powerlessness and outrage. And I am sure that we would all react this way if we were in her shoes.
Looking at her situation objectively as a coach, I also noticed is how not being able to process those emotions was also putting her out of right relationship with her bigger goals. She was very concerned about trying to remain and appear like a professional throughout and just get on with her work.
But on the inside, her intense focus on the micro (the unfairness) was also impacting her ability to see the big picture of what she wanted to achieve (settle into her role). Which meant that she was not able to see a way out, and in essence, had lost her creative ability in resolving this problem, or getting someone to help her deal with it.
Not giving her own self the space to process how she felt just compounded the fact that she was not being seen and heard by others.
My message for you today is that taking the time to hear yourself out is so important, and it is absolutely worthwhile doing so, rather than resisting it because you should ‘be’ and ‘look’ a certain way.
We can be professionals, while also being human.
And there are so many healthy ways to do this: for some of us it is speaking to another person (who is hopefully a good listener), while others might journal. I sometimes even sketch things and see a deeper meaning that is coming through the visual.
Of course, the caveat as always is that if this is a situation that is impacting your mental wellbeing, please seek professional support.
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